Cutting The Cord With Toxic Friends

We have all those experiences with malicious or toxic friends. I've always tried to master the fine art of giving someone the benefi...

We have all those experiences with malicious or toxic friends. I've always tried to master the fine art of giving someone the benefit of the doubt, and being understanding, and being smart enough to just get out.
If you've been around the block you all know that toxic friends can slip into your life and make you feel terrible about yourself. It won't happen right away, otherwise they wouldn't have ever made it to the status in your life as a "friend" but overtime you start to think " why do I put up with this"?

Here are a few signs that it may be time to cut the cord with a toxic friendship to better your life.

Ain't nobody got time for that.

They are shady- Sketchy, shady, untrustworthy: all of these characteristics under one sad umbrella. There are just times when you don't trust their motivation, maybe they blew you off, maybe you found they had been talking behind your back, they are only your friend for the opportunities you have, it doesn't matter. Bottom line, if you get the feeling something sketchy is going on... there probably is.

The are overly judgmental- You are already there to lend an ear to the latest craziness that is their life and try to keep an open mind. You honestly take the time to think about their situation and try and put yourself in their shoes. You offer up the best advice you can and when your time comes around, (which is rare they will normally make themselves "too busy" when something is wrong with you) you get the judgment and made to feel stupid. It's rude and condescending, and typically snap judgement because in reality they don't really care about you.

They are openly rude to you-  They will often insult you more often than you care to think about it. It's like middle school all over again. Being sensitive is not their strong suit, also they really are trying to be bitching. A real friend wouldn't put you down. Now friends of course do joke around but if you start really feeing hurt by her "jokes" you know it's something a little more, am I right?

She doesn't save the drama for her mama- Drama all the time. If there isn't real drama going on like a break up she will create something by altering subtext, bringing up old issues, overreacting to a comment, really anything to make a hostile hangout time. It doesn't matter if it's directed at you or some person you don't even know. THERE WILL BE DRAMA. Can I just enjoy the bread basket at this "fun lunch" please?

They have an inability to maintain friendships- Are other people kicking them to the curb as well? There is probably good reason for it. We all get in fights with our friends and we have all messed up before and will continue to do so, but if this person has trouble maintaining any longterm friendships because of constant issues (that are most likely all similar across friends) it's a big red flag that something could arise in your friendship. Keep an eye out if this tends to happen.

Remember that fights with friends are going to happen and we have all probably done something on this list from time to time. Keep trying to find that balance, but take care of yourself first and surround yourself with positive people.

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  1. This is a great post and something we all have to do from time to time.